I Knew The Day Would Come

I almost didn’t post this, because I know she’ll read it; and I don’t want her to feel guilty for having the happiness she deserves.

I expected it… I prayed for it, sincerely… I knew one day it would happen.

But I still wasn’t ready for it.

When it was over, I knew it, and accepted it. I never wanted or asked God to change it – just tried to begin to move on.

And I want more than anything for her, that she be happy.

But I wasn’t ready for it – ready to face the reality of her with someone else, having feelings for someone else. And now I’m dealing with the remnant of the hurt: what hadn’t – couldn’t have – surfaced until now, mourning the final vestiges of the deepest human intimacy I had ever known.

And I’m struggling with it.

Cast your cares on the LORD
and he will sustain you;
he will never let the righteous fall.

Psalm 55:22 (NIV)

Surely God is my help;
the Lord is the one who sustains me.

Psalm 54:4 (NIV)